The Countdown to Chaos

I put in my notice at work this week. My CELTA course is paid for, my tickets are booked, and the month countdown begins on Sunday. I depart Seattle on January 13th, and if you’re wondering, yes I’m scared silly about it. But I am also excited. I’m ready for this new adventure. Even if it turns out terribly, it’ll at least be a good story to tell. That’s one of the great things about my life. A lot of awful things have happened, like the time I lost my teeth, but they always make for the best stories. And after all, as Doctor Who reminds us,

“We’re all stories in the end.”

And I hope to make mine a good one.

 

Christmas is sneaking up quicker than I’d like, which  means January is just around the corner, and my departure will soon be imminent. I’ve been trying to take everything in here and really appreciate my life in Seattle before it vanishes. While I typically feel endless frustration with the hundreds of tourists walking at a snail’s pace through the market when I’m trying to get lunch, I’m trying to see it like I did when I first moved here. To appreciate the beauty despite the chaos.

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Pike Place Market on my way to work–the quiet before the storm

I’ve been talking a lot lately to my sister Tara, who is a teacher in Nepal. Her contract ends in the spring, and like me, her plans are very up in the air right now. I’m considering  staying with her for the month of March after my course ends, since I hear Thailand has some pretty harsh weather that time of year. And it would be nice to spend some time with her while we’re both in Asia. It’s a little unnerving not having much of a plan, but it’s also incredibly liberating knowing there are so many possibilities open to me.

In the meantime I’m trying to relax and enjoy the rhythm of life in Seattle before renewed chaos takes over. I’ve often struggled with living in the moment; I’m either planning for the future or reminiscing about past adventures. But soon enough, this time right now will be what I reminisce about. So I’m focusing on being here, now. One of my favorite poets, Emily Dickinson, once said: “Forever is composed of nows.”

I’d say it’s time to start enjoying life now.

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